"Historically, straight."
"In the pen. Got four more years before he can even think about probation."
"Whats the matter with that?"
"Slain U.S. Major Had One Exploit."
"To discourage creeps and weirdos."
"This one I like," Simon says. "Death May Haunt Calcuttas Streets, But Teeming City Throbs With Life."
"The mayor seems like a clown."
"Its a great city. We have everything."
"Theyre kind of snug. Especially if its a three-car garage. Up in the trees."
"Well he seemed nice in the beginning, Simon. He gave me an off-the-road vehicle for a wedding present. Those are big in Colorado."
"It does, it does."
"Im sorry.
Shes slicing a big radish with rapid Japanese strokes.
"Not Anne. Shes never found the right guy."
"Thanks. This salad is going to be good. I guarantee it. Let me have the lemon-pepper."
"What the fuck is that?"
"Where is he now?"
"Well I wont take you. You have my word."
"In any form. Land, sea, or in the air."
"Do you miss her?"
"Whats that weed youre putting in there?"
Veronica is fiddling with a shirt button. Theyre in the sitting room.
"Never have."
"Hed been fired a lot, from various jobs. Usually he got fired the first week. He was good at getting hired but he was a genius at getting fired. I was in a shelter for battered women for six weeks. They didnt let any?body know where it was."
"Only in principle."
"You got it."
Theres a funny chirping noise. Its the smoke alarm.
"You straight or gay?"
"Me too. Nothing wrong with being straight."
"Thats Venetian marigold. Tastes like mint."
"Rather like having only one --"
Simon doesnt understand how anybodycould do this. "What was he mad about?"
He thinks for a moment. "I was about ten. This teacher asked us all to make little churches for a dis?play, kind of a model of a church. I made one out of cardboard, worked very hard on it, and took it in to her on a Friday morning, and she was pleased with it. It had a red roof, colored with red crayon. Then another guy, Billy something-or-other, brought in one that was made of wood. His was better than mine. So she tossed mine out and used his."
"You wouldnt think youd have to worry about them in a city like this."
"Not a thing in the world."
"Whats it trying to say? Theres no smoke."
He does so, standing on a chair, my God how cheap can plastic be? feels like paper --
"Better than no Tex-Mex at all."
"Did you."
"Some pioneer cowboy chemists. As a matter of fact I was married to one of them for a while. Guy named Paul."
"Telling usthat the batterys wearing down."
"A one-exploit man."
"Must be nice."
"Oh. Looks funny."
"You like young twat, go after it. Onward to the merry hunt. You ever live and love in a garage apart?ment?"
"Theyre getting closer."
"Youve got a good ass Simon."
"What?"
"Sarah. Shes nineteen. When she was little she used to sing Im proud, proud, proud to be a cow. Thats something the cows sing on Sesame Street."
"That was your first sexual experience?"
"How far back do you want to go?"
"You mean the movie."
"Hes a great mayor. Hes got it down exactly right. Couldnt be better. Hes what we want."
"Shes a lawyer in Philadelphia. A deputy mayor, at the moment."
"All of you been married?"
"What was your first sexual experience, Simon?"
"Although --"
"Of course."
"How olds your kid? Sarah, is it Sarah?"
"Great twat out there on the streets you want some of it?"
The Times is spread all over the bar in the kitchen.
"What does she do?"
"Depends upon who youre cohabiting with. Dore has a hatpin. Six inches of cold steel."
"Right."
"The smoke alarm."
"We had crack very early, before the rest of the country."
"True."
"Not in New York State. Ive been reading in the paper about these rabid skunks."
"More fun."
"Has she stuck anybody with it?"
"That was lousy Tex-Mex last night."
"Well disconnect it for Christs sake."
"Anyone who sees Parsifal twice is a blithering idiot."
"Unbeatable," says Anne. Shes making a salad.
"Your husband was the right guy?"
"So tell me about Fort Lupton," Simon says to Dore.
"Its between Brighton and Platteville. Basically a wide place in the road," she says. "But pretty wide. We even had crack."
"Im not. Guy cut me in the face one time with a li?noleum knife. He was explaining himself."
"Why was that?"
"What does your wife want?"
"Here. You using the fancy olive oil?"
"Extra-virgin. Just like me."
